UPPLANDS - Unable to invade the keep housing Midgard's prized Thor's Hammer late last night, a large group of Hibernians picked up Mjollnir Faste and nearly ran away with it, before being crushed under its tremendous weight.
The attempted keep robbery began just after nightfall last night, soon after Huskarl Wrock Evernight began his night watch.
"I had just come down from checking in with the keep lord, when I heard a strange rumbling, and what sounded like whispers in some foreign tongue," said Evernight. "We don't usually start drinking until at least 3 am, so I knew it must actually be happening."
Evernight and the other Huskarls quickly realized that the keep itself had risen off of the ground, and was slowly creeping North. Some thought it to be some sort of dark magic, but peeking underneath, Evernight realized there were hundreds of Lurikeens beneath the keep, attempting to carry it back to their homeland.
"My big hammer is great for smashing the little buggers out in the open, but I couldn't fit it underneath to whack them," said Evernight. "We weren't sure what to do, until Bjorn came running down from his bedroom in a panic, screaming like the world was ending. He was covered in feathers from having ripped his pillow apart, thinking it was a Great Fluff Beast, and it gave me an idea."
Evernight and his companions grabbed the feathers from Bjorn's beard, carefully reached underneath the creeping keep and began to tickle the Lurikeens with the feathers. A great giggling erupted from beneath the keep, and as the Lurikeens' knees began to wobble, the Huskarls quickly stood back.
"Suddenly there was a big boom, and then complete silence," chuckled Evernight. "We pushed the keep back to where it's supposed to be, and went back in and got completely hammered."
Since the incident, the Huskarls have covered the base of the keep with feathers, hoping to prevent such an incident from recurring.